The Girl with the Mousy Hair
by bobblehat3
Summary: Set during the events of Life on Mars, Sam's friendship and love for Annie is tested like never before.... First ever Fan Fiction.


**Note - I do not own Life on Mars or the characters. This is purely a work of Fan Fiction which is to share and be enjoyed (I hope) by fellow fans. Bobblehat3**

**The Girl with the Mousy Hair**

Everything changed on the day Sam strolled into CID on a calm and cool morning. The cigarette smoke choked the lungs and hammered the senses, but Sam now felt oblivious to it after spending six months in this alien place. Only one word was needed to sum it up. 1973.

-------------

Sam was working the hours away writing reports when Annie walked past.

"Morning, Sam."

He looked up. "Morning, Annie." Sam frowned in concern. "What's the matter, Annie?"

She didn't look her normal self. Withdrawn and with red eyes, Sam knew there must be something wrong.

"Nothing, Sam. I'm fine, why do you ask?"

"It's just you look..." Then he remembered what Hunt had said earlier. "Is it the case from this morning?"

Annie blinked several times and looked away at the far wall before looking back at Sam. "The Guv told you about it then?" Tyler nodded. Annie sighed sadly. "...No murder's pleasant, but a child murder is just... " She stammered, before sighing again. "... and _two_ of them as well... it's a nasty business, Sam."

Sam nodded and stood up. "It's always horrible to think about, I know..." He paused and was suddenly unsure of what to say next. Then he remembered what he had brought with him. "... Annie, it may not be the right time, but I think I've got something that may just cheer you up a bit..."

He rummaged through his leather jacket and found what he was wanting.

"Hay presto!" Sam exclaimed as he removed the plastic case from his pocket and handed it to a curious Annie.

She turned it over to read and smiled.

"'_David Bowie hits_' "She read and looked up at him coyly. "Thanks."

"My pleasure!"

There was an awkward pause as Annie rotated the cassette in her hands and Sam sat back into his seat.

"Sam...

"Yes."

"Would you like to go out for dinner with me?" She asked demurely.

He smiled. "Yes... yes, I'd love to, Annie... unless you've got a date with David Bowie."

She smiled back. "Oh, I'm sure he won't mind being put on hold for one evening."

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The restaurant Annie had picked looked very nice and cosy and one which Sam hadn't been to before. The decor was a pleasant mix of light browns and greens - not uncommon for the decade he found himself him - and almost appeared to be smiling back at him. Perhaps it was mirroring how he felt.

As soon as Annie worked through the door Sam knew he had made the right decision. Her hair shining with its usual loveable flicks and semi curls radiated from around her subtly powdered face and red lips; her perfectly shaded light blue dress accentuating her intelligent and sophistication as well as the kindness and understanding she displayed to all she knew. She was class all the way.

Sam stood up as Annie saw him sitting at their table and smiled cheekily.

"I thought you'd stood me up.' He grinned jokingly.

"Well, got to keep you guessing sometimes - no fun otherwise.' She replied with a slight twinkle.

The meal was lovely and Sam revelled in tucking into his steak and sipping his red wine, as well as being fortunate enough to able to see one of the most beautiful human beings he had ever known sitting opposite him. He was sure Annie would have felt the same, had it not been for the return of the withdrawn and forlorn look in her dazzling blue eyes.

Every time she caught his eyes as they talked, it looked as if she was willing herself to tell Sam something, or was in two minds about a decision. Eventually, as the evening drew to a close, Sam decided that he had to ask.

"Annie."

"Yes, Sam?"

He shifted slightly in his seat before looking firmly but softly into her eyes. Annie's gaze didn't falter at the interaction, but she seemed resigned and aware to what he was about to ask.

"What's been bothering you, Annie? You've seemed... distant. Is there something you're not telling me?"

Annie expression barely altered for a few moments, but then she looked down and when she levelled her gaze back towards Sam's, a part of her seemed to have began to crumble slightly. To Sam it was as if Annie was beginning to feel the weight of whatever burden she found herself bearing. Her eyes were starting to glisten with tears and Sam felt an involuntary impulse that sent his hand to slowly hover across the table towards hers. Annie did not back away from the touch; instead it seemed to give her extra conviction as to her answer.

"It's the case from this morning...'

Sam couldn't help but be slightly surprised. He knew it had upset her earlier; who wouldn't have been? But, why was it still affecting her? His curiosity evidently showed as Annie's mouth curved into the smallest of smiles.

"I know what you're thinking... what a right overly sensitive, soppy mare I am...'

"No. I don't think-'

"Well there's more to it than that." Annie said with strong determination. Sam couldn't help but admire her. "I haven't told anyone but... but I know the child care home from this morning," She gulped. "... because I visited it once."

Sam frowned. What was she getting at?

"I've been there... because I put my own child there."

Sam mouth opened in shock and he blinked in disbelief. Annie had a child?

Annie's tears were rolling down her cheeks now, smearing some of her carefully applied make-up, and dripping onto the napkin that was laid elegantly on her lap. "It wasn't planned, any of it." Her eyes bore into Sam's eyes now, seemingly willing him to understand. "Neil never knew but... I had his son and nothing can change that now."

Sam's disbelief intensified ever still. Neil?

"Being the mother of an illegitimate child, in late 1969, was a shameful thing... especially to an old fashioned dad."

Sam's mind was whirring in an endless loop; on autopilot. _Late 1969._

Annie struggled on. "So... after he was born, my mum came with me to the care home. To him give up." She bit her lip as a new trickle of tears ran down her face. "My little Samuel..."

Sam froze. In mind and body he shut down and the warmth and cosiness from the restaurant cooled with him; sapping the contentment he'd felt just minutes earlier. _Late 1969... Samuel... No it couldn't be._

At the sudden loss of feeling in Sam's eyes, Annie closed hers as if to shut out the world and the shame of what she had done. Sam shook his head. _Of course, it was true. How could it be a coincidence?_

A first the numbness that Sam felt rendered the sound around him muffled and distant, then, suddenly, the world began to move again as he felt a soft hand grip his and Annie's voice sounded once more.

"Will you help me find him, Sam?"

He locked his eyes on hers for long moments. Was this all for real? Was Annie his... his...?

Sam slowly gripped Annie's hand back, before replying in barely above a whisper. "Of course I will, Annie. Of course I will."

Annie's tortured smile broke Sam's heart. He needed to breathe.

"I just... I just need to go outside and..." He trailed off as Annie nodded reluctantly and let his hand fall from her grasp.

Sam stood and, as if in a trance, made his way to the door of the restaurant he had began the evening feeling as if was the only place he wanted to be. Now, he had to leave. He had to. Just to breathe and process what he'd learned.

He hardly noticed opening his car door and sitting in the driver's seat. Nor did he notice turning the key in the ignition, but he wasn't leaving – he just needed to clear his head before facing Annie again. Sam felt the car lurch into action and drive into the darkness. He turned his head slightly back towards the windows of the restaurant, and glimpsed the confused and dismayed look of the woman he loved seeing him leave. But he wasn't leaving. Not yet.

Sam snapped his head back in front of him and continued on, the roads merging into one as the minutes did the same. Why couldn't he face what was happening?

Tears formed in Sam's eyes as the true comprehension of his feelings of confusion and resolution sank into his being and into his heart.

He hit his fist against the driving wheel. Vic Tyler was his dad. Ruth Tyler was his mum. Not Neil, not... Annie. And yet he knew it was true. He was Samuel Cartwright.

He smacked the wheel again harder. "NO!"

Sam hardly noticed his car lose control and collide dangerously off the road.

Nor did he barely have time to notice his car plummet into an icy river.

All Sam remembered was the blistering cold and one final thought.

_Annie._

---------------

The blinding light was too much to bear and he found it difficult to focus for a few moments. Then, slowly, Sam's vision sharpened and aligned itself to his surroundings. He was in hospital. That much was evident. But it was only when he saw the motherly Ruth Tyler smiling lovingly down at him, that he knew where he really was. Home.

"Welcome back, Sammy," She whispered warmly. "Welcome home."

Sam blinked and a film of tears formed a layer on his eyes.

"Oh, don't cry, Sam. Please don't cry... not now you're safe."

Sam closed his eyes and let her warmth generate onto him.

--------------

It was another few weeks before Sam Tyler was allowed to be discharged from hospital after a prolonged coma and a miraculous recovery. But to him it had been anything but that. It had been the result of a nightmare.

So many times when the memories from that night came back to him, had Sam wanted to ask Ruth for the truth of his parentage. But no words came. Somehow, he knew. He knew, in his hearts of hearts that there was no lie in what Annie had told him, nor any truth in the life he had led before the accident.

After being discharged, Sam, without any thought on it, wondered aimlessly through the wards, his mind whirring away to the brink of self destruction. It was then that he heard it, the distant sound of _Jean Genie_ by David Bowie.

As if by instinct, Sam tore along the ward he found himself in towards the music, in the process achieving disapproving glances from practicing nurses and doctors.

Finally, the last few bars of the song were within a few feet of him as he stood by the bedside of a weak and dying sixty year old woman, the 1970's cassette player on the table; comforting her in the last moments of her life.

Sam stepped slowly forward and bent over her. He knew that it was her.

Her face was understandably wrinkled and aged, and her hair a light grey, and slightly flicked. Her breathing was heavy as she struggled for air on the raised pillows and her beautiful blue eyes flicked every so often. She was a sorry sight.

"Oh, Annie..." He whispered.

Annie's eyes struggled to open as she tried to turn at the new sound.

Sam put his hands on hers reassuringly. "Don't worry. It's all right. I'm here."

"Who?" She croaked painfully, as her eyes desperately tried to look at the man beside her.

Sam took a deep breath as his emotions came to the surface of his eyes once again. "Your son... your Samuel."

He thought he heard Annie gasp with relief and squeeze his hands as _Jean Genie _ended and the first notes began on the next.

"Do... do you... forgive me?" Annie asked with all her remaining energy as her own tears clouded her eyes.

'_It's a God-awful small affair..._

"Of course I do..."

'_To the girl with the mousy hair..._

"Of course I do." He repeated, squeezing her hands tight, and with tears running down onto the bed sheets.

'_But her mummy is yelling "no!", and her daddy has told her to go.'_

"... Mum."

Annie and Sam looked through the tears into each other's eyes, the relief of the truth finally seeping into them.

Sam put his head onto her chest as he cried. "I love you, mum."

He felt Annie crying into his hair during her last moments at the words she'd been longing to hear for so long, and for the son she'd never known.

---------------

As Sam left the hospital, he didn't notice his footsteps.

Nor did he know where he was going.

All he knew was that he'd gone in as Sam Tyler, and now left as Sam Cartwright.


End file.
